My week without makeup

Fresh face to the world.

One time, a few years ago, I got all the way to school only to hang up my coat, look in the mirror and discover that I had completely skipped the make up step that morning.  I hurried next door to my friend Lori V.’s classroom and said, “Look at my face!” “What?” “I forgot to put makeup on this morning!”  “Oh, no worries I have extra here.  I have extra deodorant too if you need it!”  That woman saved me from so many problems with her closet full of random goodies.  The best part is that I had done this once before in fourth grade, except it wasn’t make up, it was my hair.  It was 1990 and I had sprayed my hair with so much hair spray, that I didn’t realize until halfway to school that I had not touched my hair that morning.  I checked when I got to school, and it still looked good!  I miss the ’90s.

Anyway, this week was my first week of my series of New Year’s challenges and this week I went without make up for a week.  I wasn’t that worried about it because I don’t wear a lot of makeup anyway, but I was a little worried that people might ask if I had been crying or if I was sick.  Neither happened; in fact no one that doesn’t read my blog said a word.  Of course, I guess it would be rude to say, “Did you forget to put makeup on?”, but more than that I suspect that people really just don’t pay too much attention to my face, and for that I am grateful.

I did make some observations as the week progressed and here they are in no particular order:

1) My eyelids are pink.

2) My eyelashes are a mix of light brown and black.  Kind of cool.

3) Getting ready in the morning takes a lot less time.

4) I don’t feel as pretty without make up, which is kind of nice.

5) Not wearing make up made me want to have my hair look nice.  Compensating?

6) When I smile, it matters less that I’m not wearing makeup.

7) I don’t have to worry about smearing my make up when I rub my eyes, cry, go out in the snow, or sweat.  It was kind of funny being able to rub my eyes without maneuvering around makeup.

Washing my face at night is much easier on my face.  I don’t have to scrub my eyes like I usually do, and I actually might not even really need to wash my face, but it’s a habit.

9) I had a dream about Marcy’s wedding again!  This time, it was the wedding weekend and I had just started this week of no makeup and I called Marcy and was all, “Oh my goodness!  I forgot about your wedding, I promise I won’t ruin your wedding by not wearing makeup!”  Wow, subconsciously, this might have been tougher than I thought.

10) I noticed a girl in one of my classes with a TON of makeup on and I wondered if she was smart.  If you care that much about makeup, which is pretty unimportant in the grand scheme of things, how much can you care about REAL stuff?  When I thought this, though, I was sort of stuck because I know that once in a while I get that feeling that I have to prove myself more than someone more “alternative”-looking (even if I feel sort of “alternative”-thinking).  Sometimes I feel too normal for grad school, so I think this was a very unfair thought for me to have.  Nevertheless, it popped up and there was not much I could do about it.

11) I had lots of thoughts in general about why it is that women wear makeup and men do not.  Men get to be clean and natural, but women have to be artificial.  In ancient Egypt the wealthy men wore make up, so why is it a standard female domain here and now?  Why do I feel the need to enhance my eyes and my lips and cover up my blotches?  I think it’s mostly because women are the object and men get to be the subject.  We have been reduced and objectified.  Of course, how we ended up the object is beyond me.

12) By Thursday of this week, I couldn’t have cared less about going out without makeup.  I still didn’t feel quite like myself, which is bizarre, but I ceased thinking about it on Thursday.  That was the last day I wrote down any observations on my list anyway.

So, will I continue to wear makeup?  I think I will.  Even though I don’t want to be an object, I also want to be feel normal in society, and I’ve already been indoctrinated to understand that normal for women = wearing make up.  I liked bucking the system in a tiny way this week by not wearing make up, but I wonder if it harmed me at all, at work, in classes.  I will never know for sure, and if anything, I’m sure it was minute.  These challenges are meant to get me out of myself and try to do things I wouldn’t normally do, so that I can remain just a bit uncomfortable and perhaps learn something from that discomfort.  I was uncomfortable at times and a bit more alert and that’s the goal, even if tomorrow I go right back to wearing makeup like almost everyone else.